I once had a cis dude claim that any who is in any way “male identified” or not a woman entirely and solely should never advocate for trans women as “it’s a women-only topic” despite being a “trans ally” and insisted that he was a better ally to trans women for scolding anyone who is “male identified” for even mentioning trans women except to say not to talk about them or defend them ever, claiming it “will make violence against trans women worse as it will be seen as transmisogynists being right that trans women are causing a Male Invasion” and that *he* was a “better feminist and ally to trans women” for pretending they don’t exist and letting them be attacked.
So if a cis woman faces violence, allies are supposed to rally behind her, but if trans women are murdered and left out on the street to die or called monsters *only* a woman is allowed to not stay silent, or it’s “invading a women-only discussion”.
I blocked him and several others who called me a “misogynist” and “transmisogynist” who was literally as good as murdering trans women myself by calling him out. He was applauded by “cis allies” and cis women for being a “real feminist ally” and had his shitty “how to be a Real Ally” bullshit blasted all fucking over, which summed up was “only advocate for cis women and pretend trans women don’t even exist even if you see a trans women being attacked, shut up, it’s Not Your Place”.
Anyway, cis men are by and large fucking demons who will not only excuse their own complacency but gaslight you that it makes them a better feminist and call it “allyship”, and use their power to get you blacklisted from several community spaces for being a “dangerous transmisogynist”.